MTX JackHammer: I want dat ****!

It got a 22" cone for real. It got a raw phatass magnet. It weigh 369
lbs. You need a 'Lade to haul the mofo. I want dat ****. I want dat
****!!

Whiny librarian neighbor yakkin 'bout sleep. She say she gotta work AM.
Fuk dat ****. I wake dat ***** up cause it all about ME and my fly rig.

I wanna rock da hood from 1,000 yards, none o' dat 200 yard ****. U
can't tuch dat, homes! Gimme dat MTX now, *****! Aye, it pricey but I
just steal some **** for cash. It all about ME.

http://www.mtxaudio.com/caraudio/products/subwoofers/jackHammer.cfm

"YOU'VE GOT THE RIDE. YOU'RE ROLLIN' ON DUB DUBS. STOP PLAYIN' WITH
THOSE TINY 15s AND SHOW 'EM WHAT YOU'RE ALL ABOUT. EXCESS IS IT AND
JACKHAMMER IS ALL ABOUT EXCESS!"
 
Yours truly, LBS (Ybjyvsr Obbzre Fphz)